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Freeze
of Cool Fm has called out Etcetera for shading him in his satirical
article "Lekki Husbands 2".This won't be the first time they having
issues, as Freeze has previously slammed him,calling him a failed
Musician.
Part of the article reads
Alfred, come back here when you are done. I was told you brought that stupid friend of yours into my house yesterday.’
‘Which stupid friend?’
‘The light skin radio presenter who does the evening show on that Cool station on the island.’
‘Honey can I turn off the AC before I freeze?’
‘Shut
up Alfred, stop acting like you don’t know who I’m talking about. That
presenter they say beats up his wife all the time, the one that even his
colleagues at the radio station don’t like; the one that musicians
complain about.’
‘Honey he is not my friend oo. How can you call
him my friend? Is it because he is also a Lekki husband? Must I be
friends to all Lekki husbands? If you are mistaking him for my friend
Femi, Femi is not an albino. Besides, none of my friends is a wife
beater.’
In June, Freeze slammed Etcetera for dissing celebrities in his articles ..continue..
Incase you missed the article like myself, below is the full article 'Lekki Husband 2'
Shade,
are you ok? Now you are beginning to sound like that your yeye friend
that they say slept with a former vice president and paid dearly for it.
I heard she spent all the money she got from him on treatments
afterwards.
‘Hahaha Valerie, Valerie! you sef no dey forget something?’
‘But
truth be told, I have warned all my friends including you, to try and
stay away from politicians especially now that election is around the
corner. These are dangerous times in our hustling calendar. Very soon
you will start seeing headless and mutilated corpses everywhere. And
most of these corpses are girls like us who love sweet-mouth.’
‘Shade, why don’t they use guys too for these rituals? It’s not fair naa. Why only girls?’
‘Valerie,
are you that dumb? How many guys do you see standing by the roadside
waiting for a free ride? Guys are smarter than us. Na our long throat
dem take dey catch us.’
‘Shade, I don’t think our friend Nkem
can ever stop chasing after politicians oo. She has become addicted to
their groove. I heard her talking about the things they do every night, I
was so shocked and didn’t know my mouth was hanging wide open. That
girl knows all the classy and coded joints in this town. Even the local
nkwobi and isiewu joints too.’
‘Leave that one, let her
continue. Na that nkwobi dem go take finish her. Shebi if dem finish the
nkwobi wey dey for plate, dem go enter the one wey dey inside her
cloth?’
‘Shade are you trying to scare me with this gist this
early morning because you know my movie premiere is holding later this
afternoon at the presidency?’
‘Hahaha! Babes no let dem chop your nkwobi oo.’
‘Na
today dem begin chop am? I no mind if dem chop am so far dem show me
the money. Shade, I forgot to tell you sef, I went out with a man last
night and he has promised to replace that my stolen car.’
‘YAAAAY!!!
That’s my girl. I am so happy for you dear. Abeg ask whether im get any
friend? Me sef want a new car oo. My dear, it is so sweet to be a
female celeb in naija mehn. We are the chosen ones.’
‘Shade
abeg I’m cutting this call jare, it’s almost 6am and I haven’t even
slept since I got back. Don’t forget that our flight is for 9am.’
‘Valerie, what’s that sound I have been hearing since?’
‘Don’t
mind my yeye husband, snoring like a trailer with a broken exhaust
pipe. Let me even wake up the mumu to go and do his morning chores.’
‘Alfred!
Alfred! ALFREDDDD!!! Wake up. My God, What kind of a lazy man did I
marry ehn? It is already 6am and he is still sleeping like an idiot.
Look at how he is staining my pillows with saliva. Alfred, will you get
your useless and lazy ass off my bed? Ok, you don’t want to wake up abi?
You are pretending that you can’t hear me bah? What is all this ehn?
Now I have woken my princess because I am trying to wake this useless
thing I call a husband. Awww my coochi coochi, come here princess. Come
and give mummy a kiss. How are you? Did you sleep well?’
‘Yes mummy, I slept well.’
‘Awww, that’s my coochi coochi love. Go back to your room sweerie. Uncle Alfred is coming to bathe you now.’
‘Ok
mummy. But please take it easy on Uncle Alfred. I think he is very
tired. He worked all through the night. He did the dishes and scrubbed
the kitchen floor. He also washed all the toilets in the house and
cooked spaghetti for me.’
‘Did he help you with your homework?’
‘Yes mummy. That was when he said you went out again with that man that I don’t like. Mummy I want to poo poo.’
‘JESUS!!! Alfred, if I count to three and you are still lying there, well, you already know what I will do to you.’
‘Pour
water on my face, isn’t that what you always do? You this woman sef,
your wahala is becoming too much. You better stop acting those local
movies because you are becoming as crazy as the characters you play.’
‘Come
on, shut up your dirty mouth. I should quit acting the same movies that
put food on the table right? Have you brought a penny to this house
since I married you? All you do is wake up, eat, shit and drive my car
to gossip with your fellow Lekki husband friends and come back here
snoring like a camel at night. Hope you replaced the fuel you used
yesterday because I am getting tired of spending my hard-earned money on
your lazy ass.’
Honey, what do you mean that all I do is
eat, sleep and shit? Don’t I wash the cars every morning? Don’t I also
loosen your braids? Why are you lying that I haven’t spent a dime on you
since you married me? Didn’t I buy you a handkerchief last week? Why
are you talking to me this way? Is it because I lost my job before you
married me? Is this how other female celebs talk to their men?’
‘Since
when did you become a man? The only time you are a man is at night when
you want sex. Mscheew. Man ko, mango ni. For your information, other
female celebs treat their men like the crap that they are. You should
thank your stars I have a better heart. Ask your friend Gbenga, let him
tell you how he was washing shit off his wife boyfriend’s car tyres the
last time I was at their house.’
‘Mummy, Uncle Alfred, I want to poo poo naa.’
‘Awww
coochi coochi, I’m so sorry. Oya Alfred take her to poo poo. Make sure
you bathe her properly and get her ready on time. Her piano teacher will
soon be here. Alfred, come back here when you are done. I was told you
brought that stupid friend of yours into my house yesterday.’
‘Which stupid friend?’
‘The light skin radio presenter who does the evening show on that Cool station on the island.’
‘Honey can I turn off the AC before I freeze?’
‘Shut
up Alfred, stop acting like you don’t know who I’m talking about. That
presenter they say beats up his wife all the time, the one that even his
colleagues at the radio station don’t like; the one that musicians
complain about.’
‘Honey he is not my friend oo. How can you call him
my friend? Is it because he is also a Lekki husband? Must I be friends
to all Lekki husbands? If you are mistaking him for my friend Femi, Femi
is not an albino. Besides, none of my friends is a wife beater.’ ’I
hear you. Oya, come and help me with this dress. Can you imagine I am
going late for my own movie premiere?’
‘Honey, are you not going to wear a bra? Don’t you think this your blue dress is too revealing?’
‘Alfred,
stop asking stupid questions and pull up the damn dress. Didn’t I tell
you that my movie premiere is at the Presidential Villa? And you want me
to wear a bra?’
‘Ehen? Are you going to premiere your movie or yourself?’
‘Alfred
please, I am not in the mood for your meaningless talks. Just shut up
ok? How do you think I put food on the table? Has it ever occurred to
you to ask how I bought the cars you drive? Do you think any female
celebrity can achieve anything in this country by wearing bra? Help me
bring my phone joo, that must be Shade. I’m off but I will be back in
Lagos with the last flight. Me and my girls are hanging out here in
Lagos tonight. Hey Alfred, before I forget, when Princess is asleep, I
need you to rush down to “The Palms” and buy a pack of boxers for that
my dark man-friend. His birthday is tomorrow.’
‘Honey what is his waist size?’
‘Alfred,
please be smart for once. You are asking me this stupid question as if
you haven’t met him before. Ok, he’s your size. If that’s what you want
to hear. Please take very good care of my Princess. And don’t let me
look for you when I get back. Do you hear me? Alfred, are you deaf? I
say don’t let me look for you when I am back.’
‘Ahan naa honey, I have heard you.’